Tag: respect

Fitting

October 31, 2025 by Cassandra Johnson

Accepting all I deserve?

It’s coming easier.

I am reminiscent of how not to deny myself. I am reminded not to expect less. I am reminded of insistent examples.

I am reminded of my 31st birthday via my brother and us sharing ideas and outlooks.

I am swept up in the memory of that birthday, of inviting friends to share the date with me, to enjoy our time together. I do not remember being especially hungry. I enjoyed the food. I enjoyed the drinks but I mostly recalled the satiation being filled by the company and their intentions.

I am struck by the memory of a celebration of many friends from different parts of my life coming together and how supported I felt in their respect for each other out of their own interests and their respect for me. I love seeing them in their element and not too focused on me, unnaturally, but very fluidly focused on me and our relationships.

I was captured by them, captured by the presence we stayed in. Wrapping up our goodbyes intermittently as they had to leave, I am struck how I could ask for what I really wanted and be treated so deserving.

What I really was reflecting on is how stark it could be to stay in this mode when life’s pressures mount around you and you’re most likely in work mode.

Interestingly in a space of employing so much effort, a lot more factors like bosses and profit work to the effect of convincing you of not being deserving and of extracting more of you than is willing to be given in return. I have been talked out of acknowledging what I deserve in these spaces but now I am reminded. Examples of being deserving are insistent and luckily, my family/friend support system is as well.

Ours to Claim

March 30, 2023 by Cassandra Johnson

As I found myself doing my gratitude recognition and being prayerfully mindful of the simple things I have like my basic needs and even many desires, I realized what I can easily overlook. I usually recognize what is recent and constant but had to note, there is something more. There is another more grounded foundation for gratitude. This aspect can be irreplaceable. There is the appreciation for the multitude of experiences passed, places I got the honor of seeing, circles in which I moved, and people who accepted me in the most respectable, affectionate ways and then there are people to whom I had the pleasure of providing help, encouragement and support.

The memories of circumstances, events, past friends and current friends will always have their place. You and I cannot be robbed of these fortunes. There is an appreciation for experiences and circumstances I will always hold dear or from which I was able to recover and learn. We are all fashioned with a unique story. I am sure we can think of interesting people we have met, people that find us interesting, misfortune we have escaped or surpassed, and just simply being somewhere maybe especially fun or peaceful. The fact is no one can take away the moments you were able to live through and the personal way they made you feel. They will always have space and credit for being a part of your process. We get to be here and unlike new developments, there is an irreplaceable gratitude we can affix to the lives we have lived, to date.

Getting to experience the college student’s life was one stand out. Immediately following high school, I got to be the first in my immediate family to go away for this honor. I am lucky my parents and several of my teachers normalized this path for me. You get quite the momentum when people support your progress and or/ treat your path as given.

Being able to explore my cultural interests has been another spotlight. Volunteering freely here and in South America was a reminder of being in a brave and comfortable enough place to decide to uproot my life and provide some assistance for others. I can always appreciate the extended leap I took. Otherwise, I could have never counted so many international people among my friends.

Thanks to my parents, I also feel there is this work and study ethic forged inside my brothers and I, adding to our perseverance and endurance.  I cannot say all forms of striving are healthy or necessary (it can go left) but I am happy to see many instances were efforts equal purpose and achievement. The incredible influence that my parents, their parents and our ancestors have on us is something I can be grateful to hold within me, especially when I am down. Eventually, I get back to hope.

I am grateful no one can take away our experience. No one can take away all we got to do and see and who we got to meet. For better or worse, as I get older, I am remembering how I have survived and in what I have relished. I am remembering to have appreciation for moments passed. Different circumstances, different settings, different crowds. Remaining grateful for what comes now, I am pleased we get to have so many priceless gems tucked away.

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